Week 9 and three
quarters
Actual Updates!: These things don’t necessarily
pertain to my project, but they are funeral industry related things that
happened in the, yes, 2 weeks since my last post. The project has been kind of
quiet for the same excuses . . . um . . . reasons, I mean, that I have given
before: School takes precedence. And, I will have you know, that my time has
not been wasted in that regard. Oh, no! Since my last post, I took and passed
with a 75% a mid-term in Accounting that quite a few people in the class
failed; I wrote a short paper on E-commerce (snore), I’m gearing up to write
another paper for the same class on Cloud Computing (bigger snore); and I got a
better-than-average score on a quiz in Economics, which is an interesting
class, but requires much less attention than my other 2 classes.
Halloween: I helped my boss,
Heather Dvorak, hand out info, business cards and flowers at a Red Cross/Circle
K event at the TRAC in Pasco, WA. It was a nice little event. If you are a
resident of the Tricities and you’re looking for a nice, safe, and, most
importantly, warm way to Trick-or-Treat with your kids next year, I recommend going
to the TRAC. They had live music, a Zombie Walk, a blood drive, prizes that
were raffled off (the husband of the event coordinator seemed to be the only
person with the foresight to buy tickets since he seemed to be the only person
winning), and Trick-or-Treating for the kids.
This was the first year of the event and they allowed the venders
to use the booths for free. We arrived 2 hours early so we wound up with a
pretty nice spot close to the door. They shut off the lights soon after the
event started. This took a lot of the venders by surprise, but luckily, Heather
brought lights for added flair and attention. This wound up making us one of
the few booths people could actually see when they came in from the lighted
entrance way.
I got to spend more time getting to know my boss, I met more of
her family and most of my coworkers came in so I got to meet all of them. I’m realizing
that this may be a little confusing, so I figure it’s about time I explain:
Dvorak Funeral Home is a very new business. They have a full
staff, but very few people work there fulltime. It’s mostly a loose amalgam of
funeral professionals and licensed agents for the various services we sell and
provide. For now, it’s mostly run by Heather Dvorak out of a storefront in
Pasco until we get a larger facility and a larger clientele base. In the mean
time I am working at a Starbucks kiosk inside of an Albertsons grocery store in
south Richland.
Side note: It’s a rather strange
coincidence, but most of the people who graduated with me in the Mortuary program
at Mount Hood CC who aren’t yet working full time in the industry or in related
fields are working for espresso stands or other coffee shops. Weird. I’m sure
there’s a Doctoral thesis in this somewhere. That is, if this occurs in more
than just this small, anecdotal grouping that I’ve personally observed. Even then,
correlation is not causation, and one must always be cautious when observing
facts not to let one’s own confirmation biases influence the conclusion they
draw.
Oops, sorry for the pedantic rant. Yeap, it’s confirmed. I’m a
college student.
Where was I? Oh yeah, The event at the TRAC (which stands for Trade
Recreation Agricultural Center
Last Wednesday: I went to a WSFDA
(Washington State Funeral Directors Association) / IEFDA (Inland Empire Funeral
Directors Association) meeting in Spokane. For those not in the industry,
Meetings like this occur routinely in the fall and spring in different regions
of Oregon and Washington. I’m not sure what happens in other states, but I can’t
imagine it being too dissimilar. These meetings allow funeral Directors and
their staff to meet, greet, network and sneer at other Funeral professionals in
their respective areas. In Washington State, these meetings have an educational
portion, usually presented by a member of the WSFDA, which fulfills a portion
of the continuing education credits needed to maintain a Funeral Directors and/or
Embalmer s license in Washington. There’s often a speaker or speakers who give
short talks on a subject relevant to the industry or the region. It starts with
introductions, then a prayer, the Pledge of Allegiance (to the Flag of the USA,
I felt like I might need to clarify for some reason), dinner is served, minutes
are read, presentations given, the educational portion, old business, new business,
closing, then dismissal.
I missed both of the meetings in our area last year because I
had class both days in the fall and the spring. This year was no different, but
I went anyway and apparently missed everybody moping about their mid-term
scores in my Accounting class. I’m kind of glad I wasn’t there for that.
I went to the meeting in Spokane, rather than a closer one
because I knew the meetings were usually in November, but I never heard about
one in my area. I figured I was better safe than sorry driving the 2 and ½ hours
and not missing out on the CE (continuing ed.) credits. Turns out I was not
alone. No one on Dvorak’s Staff was told about the meeting in our area which
was held in Walla Walla (1 hour drive, but still closer) Tuesday, the night
before the meeting I went to. I found out about this meeting when I checked my
phone and saw an E-mail from my boss explaining the situation. She was upset,
but it turned out that it was a clerical error that was the cause for none of
us being informed.
The meeting was in Downtown Spokane and my hayseed, backwoods
self didn’t even consider the idea that I might need change for a parking meter
when I got there. As far as I know, there are no parking meters in the
Tricities. This is probably because the area is decentralized and very
suburban-esque without much urban to speak of. Luckily, a few good Samaritans traded
me change for bills so I didn’t have to park miles away from the where the
meeting was being held. That would not have been pleasant. It’s cold in Spokane
this time of year.
I was early and I ran into a few people from the graduating
classes before me at Mount Hood, none of whom recognized me. Oh well, I
probably couldn’t pick anyone from the 2012 and 2013 classes out of a lineup
either. I got to finally meet Jewell Folsom, the lovely and overworked
Executive Director of the WSFDA. I had spoken to Jewell throughout my time in
the industry through e-mail and phone, but had never met her until now. She showed
her support for my project and seemed genuinely happy to meet me, which I was
kind of surprised by because I was sure I had annoyed her on occasion with my questions
over the years. And there will
eventually come a day when I’ll stop being surprised that people think this
project is a good idea, I’m sure of it.
I met and had some good little chats with a few Spokane area
funeral directors. I even met a guy who works for a new funeral business that
caters specifically to Catholics. I found this fascinating. According to this individual,
the local Diocese decided, not long ago, that they needed a funeral home that
catered exclusively to them and their congregants in the Spokane area. They
called a few local funeral directors, bought a few facilities, and got up and
running. Definitely something I plan to investigate further a little down the
road.
Well, if I don’t slow down, I’ll be at this all night.
Here are a few articles I read lately that are somewhat relevant
to this project and the funeral industry as a whole that I recommend you all check
out.
Here is a great article that was recommended by a classmate. It’s
about a small island, called Hart Island, in New York that has a mass grave of
mostly indigents and the unclaimed. “Hart is dense with history; it’s been used
as a prison for Confederate soldiers, a workhouse for the poor, a women's asylum, and a N[u]ke missile base during the Cold War.”:
On a somewhat lighter note, a website for The Infinity Burial
Project describing their product the Mushroom Death Suit:
They would probably hate it that I’m making this observation,
but it reminded me of the second episode of the TV show Hannibal (I really love
this show) where a killer was growing mushrooms on his still-living victims in
the middle of the woods.
A radio news story about the 11 Nations of North America as
divided by Colin Woodward. “Woodward has
studied American voting patterns, demographics and public opinion polls going
back to the days of the first settlers, and says that his research shows
America is really made up of 11 different nations”: http://www.npr.org/2013/11/11/244527860/forget-the-50-states-u-s-is-really-11-nations-says-author?utm_content=socialflow&utm_campaign=nprfacebook&utm_source=npr&utm_medium=facebook
If you’re curious why it’s called the Inland Empire (and no, it’s
not because of the 2006 David Lynch):
A news story from a local ABC affiliate about the event at the
TRAC: http://www.kvewtv.com/article/2013/oct/31/out-blood-blood-drive/
That’s it for now.
Like last time and all the times before, if you have any
questions, concerns, suggestions, spelling or grammatical corrections (how will
I ever learn if no one ever says anything), words of support or encouragement,
confessions of love, hate-filled rantings of utter distain, or anything else
for me, do not hesitate to email me at funhomeambo@gmail.com.
I’ll (not always) post a new one of these every week. Feel free
to e-mail me and call me a loser if I don’t live up to my self-imposed
deadline.
Hope you enjoyed it and I thank you for reading all of this or
skipping to the end, whichever is the case.
Johnathan Hove
P. S. Yes, that was a
Harry Potter reference in the title. I saw an opportunity and I seized it.
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